How a Resurrection Really Feels
by broodyandcheery143
Summary: Quinn Fabray is back on top and back to torturing Rachel Berry, never stopping to think how it affects the brunette. One day she wakes up looking a lot like Rachel, and is in for a rude awakening when she lives a day in Rachel's shoes. One-shot.
1. Chapter 1

**So this idea has been stuck in my head for months and now I finally have the time to write it down. This is surprisingly not a Quick one-shot, but more a a Faberry friendship thing. I hope you enjoy and remember to review after you read!**

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How a Resurrection Really Feels

Quinn Fabray loved being popular. She loved the feeling of being on top, everyone else wishing they could be as pretty and popular as she is. That's why when the opportunity to gain her popularity back arose, she snatched it as fast as she could. She was no longer Quinn Fabray: the girl who got pregnant, who was kicked out of her house, and who lied about the baby daddy, but was back as Quinn Fabray: head cheerleader, girlfriend of the popular football player, and all around social butterfly.

There were duties, though, that came with being popular that Quinn had to do. One of them was picking on those who were less fortunate than her; those who didn't even appear on the social hierarchy. The one Quinn chose to pick on the most ever since freshman year when Quinn saw her trying to flirt with her then crush, Finn Hudson, was Rachel Berry. Quinn had done every nasty thing to Rachel in the book. She had slushied her, drawn pornographic pictures of her in the bathroom, embarrassed her in front of the whole school, and called her every mean name she could think of.

Some might call Quinn a bitch for doing all these things to Rachel, but Quinn knew it was all part of the job, especially if she didn't want Santana stealing the position from her. Last year when she was pregnant she found herself going soft, but she blamed it all on the baby hormones and once she had given the tiny infant up for adoption her stone-cold exterior was back.

Which is why Quinn was currently walking down the busy hallways of William McKinley High School, freezing cold slushy in hand. The drink was starting to really make her hand cold, so she began to walk quickly down the hall. Her serfs, as she liked to call the rest of the student body, saw the slushy and knew what was going to happen. Their eyes followed the Queen Bee as she approached her victim. Rachel was standing at her locker, fixing her hair in the mirror, not suspecting a thing.

Quinn walked right up behind her. "Hey man hands," she smirked. Rachel, startled, turned towards Quinn who then threw the slushy right into her tan face.

Rachel's face collapsed from her signature smile, to a frown, and then to pain when the ice hit. Quinn laughed along with the serfs who had followed her, and gave a fellow cheerleader a high-five.

"Sorry Treasure Trail, it slipped," Quinn said as she pretended to be shocked by her actions. Rachel didn't say anything for a minute.

She looked like she was about to say something to Quinn, but deciding against it, and she turned around and ran to the nearest bathroom. Quinn saw the humiliation and sadness in Rachel's eyes, but she chose to ignore it because it made this process a whole lot easier.

Quinn turned around and laughed a bit more with the serfs before throwing the cup in the garbage and making her way to her locker to grab her books.

X-X-X-X-X

That night Quinn was exhausted from a long day of Cheerios practice. After dinner she took a shower, did a little homework, and went straight to bed.

The next morning her alarm went off as usual. As she turned over to press the snooze button she noticed the alarm went off at 6:00 instead of 6:30, when she usually got up. Then she noticed it wasn't her alarm clock at all; instead of her light purple one, there was a pink, Hello Kitty one. Quinn thought maybe she was still dreaming, so she closed her eyes for a minute, then opened them again, but no such luck. She turned on her back and stared at the ceiling before noticing her white fan was replaced by a yellow one. She scrunched up her perfectly shaped eye-brows in confusion. It wasn't until she sat up and looked around the room, though, that she really began to worry. Her pale blue walls, religious pictures, and posters of Taylor Lautner and Zac Efron were replaced by yellow walls, stickers of gold stars, and posters of Broadway musicals.

Quinn, habitually, wiped the sleep out of her eyes. When she saw her hands, though, she noticed they were much more tan than usual. She thought that was weird considering she hadn't had a chance to use Coach Sylvester's tanning bed passes yet. Nervously, she began to twirl her finger through her hair. She noticed it was thicker than usual and when she looked at it and saw it was chocolate brown she had to use all her power not to scream.

She quickly jumped out of the bed, panicked. This was not her room. This was not her skin or her hair. This was not her house. Where was she and what was she doing there?

She looked straight forward into the mirror and noticed for the first time she looked fully and completely like Rachel Berry. This time she couldn't hold it in; she screamed…loudly.

She heard rushed footsteps coming up the stairs before her door was thrown wide open. "Rachel, why on earth are you screaming?" asked a man that Quinn recognized as one of Rachel's dads.

Quickly, Quinn thought of an excuse. "Just doing some vocal exercises. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so loud." At least her voice sounded like Rachel as well, even if it was a bit shaky.

The tall, dark-skinned man gave Rachel a skeptical look before nodding. "Okay, well, keep it down please. Or the neighbors will complain…again."

"Yes, sir," Quinn said. The man turned out of the room and closed the door behind him. It was then that Quinn's eye caught sight of a neon pink sticky note stuck onto Rachel's vanity mirror. It read:

**A bitch to Rachel, that you are.**

**But your actions leave a scar.**

**Now is your chance to see**

**How truly hurtful your actions can be**

Quinn read it over and over until she had the thing memorized. So this was all a sort of payback for the things she had done to Rachel?

She shook her head. No, there was no way this was true. This sort of thing didn't happen in real life; only the movies. She had to still be asleep. She tried pinching herself, but no such luck. She lightly banged her head on the vanity, smashed her finger in a drawer, and stubbed her toe on the closet door, but still nothing worked. After a couple minutes of trying to wake herself up, Quinn figured nothing was going to work, so she might as well live the dream and get it over with.

She refused to take a shower, not wanting to see any more of the brunette than she had to. She put Rachel's thick, brunette hair into a high pony tail, and straightened out the bangs. She dug into Rachel's closet, and in the very back, buried under layers of skirts and animal sweaters was a pair of dark-washed jeans. Quinn picked that and the least hideous blouse she could find before applying make-up and making her way downstairs.

Luckily, Rachel's house was designed the same as most homes in Lima, so it wasn't that hard for Quinn to find the kitchen. When she walked in she was met with the pleasant aroma of pancakes. The dad that had come up earlier to check on her was now in the kitchen flipping pancakes and whistling to himself.

"Oh, hello Pumpkin," the man smiled as he saw Quinn walk into the room. Quinn tried to act as normal was possible when she returned his smile, but Rachel had always been the good actress, not her.

"That outfit is definitely different for you, Rach," the man commented.

She shrugged. "I thought I would switch it up a bit today."

The man nodded and that was the end of that. "Would you like some pancakes?" he asked. "They're vegan."

Usually Quinn wouldn't eat pancakes because she was always worried about fitting into her Cheerios uniform, but she figured it was Rachel's body, not hers, so why not go for it?

"Man, you were really hungry," Rachel's dad said after Quinn had eaten her second helping. She hadn't had anything as good as pancakes in a long time, and she was going to take advantage of it while she could.

She looked at the clock and saw that she had fifteen minutes to get to school. "I guess I better go," she said as she grabbed Rachel's backpack and slung it over her shoulder.

"Alright babe, I want you to remember that no matter what anyone does or says to you that you will always be better than them by taking the higher road. If that Quinn girl bothers you again, tell a teacher because I don't want to see you coming home crying for the fourth day in a row, okay?" Quinn felt a pang of guilt shoot through her body. She was the girl he was talking about; she was the girl who had made Rachel cry three days in a row, if not more.

Quinn nodded, not able to speak. He pulled her into a tight hug. "I love you Rachel, and no matter what anyone says you are the most special, talented, and beautiful daughter in the world, and nothing will change that." Quinn found herself melting into his hug a bit. Her dad would never say these words to her, even before she got pregnant. He was always hassling her to be perfect, constantly telling her she wasn't good enough. It was nice having someone tell her she was okay just the way she was for once, even if he wasn't directly talking about her.

He let go of her, and Quinn reluctantly did the same. She smiled at him wide before heading out towards the garage. Once Quinn had started Rachel's car and was pulling out of the driveway she noticed she had no idea where Rachel lived, and didn't know how to get to school. She drove around for five minutes before finally finding a street she recognized, and made it to school in just enough time.

When Quinn first entered the school she had forgotten she wasn't her normal self, and was confused when nobody parted the hallways as she walked down. Most people ignored her altogether, but some of the more popular kids snickered things to each other as she passed. Quinn felt a strange sense of déjà vu, thinking back to the time when she was pregnant and everyone did the same thing.

She found Rachel's locker easily, since it was the place she slushied the brunette most of the time. As she walked towards it people bumped into her without even saying they were sorry or even acknowledging they hit her at all. Quinn felt more invisible than ever when she finally arrived at the locker. She suddenly realized she didn't know Rachel's locker combination, but somehow when she grabbed the lock her fingers moved and unlocked it. Quinn stood there a bit confused as first, but then she just shrugged it off and reached into Rachel's locker. It's not like that was the weirdest thing to happen that day, anyway.

She gathered Rachel's books and made her way to Rachel's first block class, which somehow she knew, just as invisible as before. She kind of felt bad for Rachel. No one smiled at her or even looked at her, and for the first time she got a glimpse of just how lonely it must be to be the brunette.

Rachel's first block was Pre- Calculus, which Quinn was pretty good at. But when the teacher called for everyone to choose partners, everyone in the room avoided Quinn's eyes. The other kid who ended up without a partner's face fell when he realized who he was stuck with. He looked over to his two friends and gave them death stares. They shrugged in apology, and Quinn just sat there open-mouthed. Couldn't they tell she could see everything they were doing? Quinn then realized that they didn't care that she could see.

The boy moved over to an empty desk near Rachel. "Why don't we do these on our own, and we can just compare our answers and pretend like we did them together?" the boy suggested.

"O…okay," Quinn stammered, a little hurt by his comment. Was it really so bad to work with the brunette?

The next two classes, Physics and English, were just as bad. Quinn honestly felt like she wanted to cry when she realized she had been through three classes and the only time someone had talked to her was when they were saying they didn't want to be her partner. She couldn't understand how Rachel seemed so bubbly and happy all the time. When Quinn was treated like this (although it had never been this bad for her) all she did was mope around and cry. Quinn always thought Rachel just had amazing self-confidence and never let anything get to her, but now she was starting to realize that maybe the brunette was just acting at school, but inside she was truly miserable.

Things only got worse when she was at her locker, grabbing her books for Spanish the following period. She heard large footsteps behind her, and habitually turned around, thinking it might be Sam. But it wasn't Sam, it was Karofsky, and in his hand was a purple slushy.

"Quinn's not at school today, so I thought I'd do her a favor and do this for her," he said. When she saw his hand move, she squinted her eyes shut, right before the slushy hit her square in the face. Quinn felt the familiar burning feeling as the ice dripped down her cheeks. Quinn not only wanted to cry because of the humiliation, but because of how much it stung. Normally she wouldn't have stood for this; she would have given Karofsky a piece of her mind, and made him wish he had never done it, but she could hear the voice of Rachel's dad echoing through her head telling her to take the high road, so she did what Rachel usually did, which was turn around and run off to the nearest bathroom, as everyone around her laughed and pointed.

As she made her way to the bathroom she passed Finn. She momentarily expected Finn to intervene and reprimand Karofsky for what he did, but then she remembered Rachel and Finn had broken up, leaving the brunette with no one to turn to.

Quinn had been slushied before, but for some reason this time seemed ten times worse than all the others. This time was purely for humiliation. When Quinn realized this is what she made Rachel feel like every single day she began to weep. She stood in front of sink, and grabbed it before slumping over and crying. When she looked up into the mirror she once again looked back into Rachel's big brown eyes. She looked at Rachel in the mirror, covered in purple corn syrup, tears streaming down her face. Quinn felt so much guilt in that moment that she thought she might throw up. She willed herself not to as she turned on the sink and began the process of cleaning herself off.

It took a while to get completely clean, and when the hallway was clear she had to sneak to Rachel's locker for a pair of clean clothes.

Luckily, her next class was Spanish, which Mr. Schuster taught, and he excused her when she was late. When class was over she left as quickly as possible, seeing in his eyes he wanted to ask questions.

Next period was lunch, and Quinn was nervous. Who did Rachel usually sit with? Quinn was always so wrapped up in her own little world she never even bothered to notice.

She decided on a salad for lunch, not wanting to break Rachel's being a vegan. She had already destroyed so much of Rachel, she didn't want to destroy one more thing.

She found Mercedes, Tina, and Mike sitting at a table. She didn't know if that's who Rachel usually sat by but she decided to go ahead and try because that was her best bet.

"Hey guys, can I sit you with?" she asked.

Mercedes shrugged. "Sure."

She awkwardly sat down next to the other diva of the group. They continued on with their conversation as if she wasn't there. Quinn sat and quietly ate her salad, not wanting to butt in on the conversation and get Rachel into more trouble.

Lunch finally ended and Quinn was happy she had Glee next; at least it would be something familiar.

When she entered the choir room Brittany, Santana, Tina, Mike, and Puck were already in there. She took a seat in the back, and eavesdropped on the conversation they were having.

"Quinn's not at school today," she heard Tina say. She immediately perked up at the mention of her name.

"She's probably preggers again," Santana said, rolling her eyes. Everyone looked over at Puck.

"Hey, don't look at me," Puck said. "She won't even let me near her now that she's back on top." Quinn did feel some guilt when she heard him say that because it was true, she had been ignoring him ever since giving the baby up for adoption and rejoining the Cheerios. She wanted to forget last year and everything that came with it, but when she saw the hurt look in his eyes when he said that she realized maybe she was wrong to push him away.

"It's kind of sad," Tina said, "That she thinks everyone likes her when really everyone just pretends to like her because they're scared of her. They don't want to end up like Rachel," she whispered the last part, but Quinn could still hear.

Suddenly she began to internally freak out. Did everyone really just pretend to like her? She thought about it before realizing she had just as many real friends as Rachel did; none. When she had gotten pregnant last year the only real friends she had were Kurt, who transferred, and Mercedes, with whom she had sort of been ignoring lately, afraid she would bring down her rep. Santana, Brittany, and the other Cheerios were only friends with her when she was on top because last year when she was just as far down as Rachel, they hadn't even acknowledged her existence, but now that she was back on top, they worshipped at her feet.

Quinn began to feel dizzy and the room began to spin. All this was too much for one day. Mr. Schuster walked in the room and Quinn stood up, about to ask him if she could go see the nurse when the room began to move and her eyes began to go black. Before she knew it she fainted and fell to the floor.

X-X-X-X-X

Quinn woke up with a monster headache. She sat up in her bed, but it was too fast because suddenly felt like she was going to throw up. She held onto the blankets for support and steadied herself as the feeling left.

The door to her room opened and her mom, Judy, peaked her head inside. "Quinnie, is your head feeling better?" she asked.

Quinn furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "Yea, it still hurts. Why is it hurting so badly?"

"You don't remember?" Judy asked.

Quinn shook her head. "You were on the top of the pyramid at Cheerios practice and you fell and hit your head. Your doctor said you have a slight concussion and that you should stay in bed today."

"Oh, yea, I remember now," Quinn lied.

"Do you need anything?" Judy asked.

"No, I'm fine right now," Quinn answered.

"Okay, let me know if you need anything," Judy said and Quinn nodded. Judy left the room and closed the door behind her.

For some reason Quinn felt a little uncomfortable in her own skin. She couldn't describe the feeling, but she just felt, for a second, that her body didn't fit her. She looked at the mirror and saw herself sitting in bed. Everything about her looked usual. She looked down and back up again, but this time she noticed a neon pink stinky note stuck on it she was sure was not there before.

She slowly got out of bed and walked over to the mirror, grabbing the sticky note. It read:

**Today has been a test to see**

**How good of a person you can truly be**

**Now you know how it feels to be someone new**

**And how hard it can be to be someone who's not you**

**So take the lessons you learned today**

**And put them to use tomorrow and always.**

Suddenly the memory of what happened that day flooded back into her memory. She remembered waking up as Rachel, scared and confused, but feeling better once she talked to Rachel's dad. She remembered feeling invisible at school, and how bad it felt not to be wanted. She remembered being slushied and the complete humiliation that went with it. She remembered what people said about her in the choir room, and how she needed to change.

As the memories began to resurface Quinn was so shaky she had to sit down. She didn't know if what had just happened to her was a dream or real, but she did know that she would never be the same again.

The first thing she planned to do was quit the Cheerios. It had always had such a negative influence on her personality, and really she didn't enjoy it that much anyway.

Then she would go and find Puck and apologize for the way she had treated him that year. She would tell him she only pushed him away because she was scared because she knew deep down that she had feelings for him. And that scared her more than anything because she didn't want a repeat of the year before. But she was going to face her fears now, instead of pretending to be someone she wasn't.

Lastly she was going to find Rachel. She was going to sit the brunette down and tell her how absolutely terribly sorry she was for everything she had ever done to her. She was going to tell Rachel she knew an apology for the hurt she had caused her wasn't nearly enough to make up for it, but it was a start. She would vow right then and there that she would never throw another slushy in Rachel's face or call her another nasty name. She would try and find the words to explain how deeply sorry she was, and she hoped Rachel would believe she was sincere. But if Rachel didn't forgive her she wouldn't be mad because what she had been doing to Rachel for years was awful, and really unforgivable.

She would also tell Rachel how truly lucky she was to have such great dads who loved her no matter what. She would tell Rachel never to take that for granted because not everyone had it.

After tomorrow Quinn's life would change. She would become the person she was always meant to be, but she just needed a little extra help getting there. She would stop making other's feel bad to make herself feel good. She would stop letting her parent's opinions affect how she lived her life. She would stop letting her fears blindside her, and most of all she would do everything she could to make sure no one else at William McKinley High School felt as invisible as she did that day, especially Rachel.


	2. Chapter 2

**So I know I originally said this was a one-shot, but I had so many people tell me they wanted to see everyone's reactions to Quinn's epiphany that I decided I'd go ahead and write it. Also, I'm aware its over a month late, but better late than never! So if it's been a while since you read it, I suggest going back and reading part one again.**

**I hope you enjoy this second part, and please don't ask for a third, this is definately the end this time. Enjoy and please review so I know how you liked it :)**

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Part 2

Quinn woke up the next morning both excited and a bit apprehensive about the day before her. There was a lot she had to do and apologize for and she wanted to get it all done, and she wanted to do it right.

She put her Cheerios outfit on for what she new would be the last time, and put her blonde hair into a high ponytail as usual. She grabbed her books and made her way downstairs to the kitchen; the empty kitchen. She sighed, knowing her mom was still sleeping, probably hung over from her self-medication the day before, and everyday for that matter. And her dad, of course, was already at work.

She grabbed a banana, trying not to think of how nice and cozy Rachel's dad had been in her dream or vision or whatever you want to call it. She really needed that right now, a parent to be supportive in everything she did. She knows when her parents find out she is quitting the Cheerios today they will freak, and possibly kick her out of her house again for being such a disappointment. But she didn't care anymore. It was time to be her own person, and finally do things for herself.

After she finished her banana she headed out to her car and drove to school. As she walked through the front doors and down the hall she could feel people's eyes on her, the Queen Bee of the school, but where it usually flattered her, it kind of freaked her out right now. How could she have ever liked for people to watch her and scrutinize her every move?

She was standing at her locker gathering her books together when she heard large footsteps behind her.

"Hey, Fabray," said the deep voice of Dave Karaofsky. "I was at the 7-11 before school picking up a slushie for some nerd who had the balls to look me in the eyes and I figured I'd go ahead and get you one for Rachel." He put a red slushie our for her to take.

"No thanks," she said shaking her head. "I'm not going to slushie Rachel today."

He chuckled. "Good one. Everyone knows you've slushied her everyday this year."

"Well not today," she said getting aggravated and slammed her locker door shut.

"Why you have a crush on that hobbit now?"

"Grow up Karaofsky," she said, rolling her eyes. "There's more to life than slushying people."

"Whatever," he said. "I'll do it myself then."

She was about to turn around and tell him no when she saw Rachel walking down the hall on her way to English class. She wanted to tell Rachel to turn around and walk away as fast as she could, but she knew Rachel would never believe her. So she watched in horror as Karaofsky walked past her and threw the ice cold slushie straight into the brunette's face.

Watching Rachel's face fall ripped right into Quinn's heart. After her vision she felt very connected to Rachel and it oddly felt like looking into a mirror. She looked around to the group of people laughing and pointing at Rachel and exploded.

"You all should be ashamed of yourselves!" she yelled. "How could you sit and laugh as someone was being humiliated like this? What if you were in her shoes? You wouldn't be laughing then would you?" And with that she grabbed a stunned Rachel by her wrists and pulled her into the nearest bathroom.

Quinn left Rachel standing by the door, still petrified with shock as she walked to the sink and turned on the water. She let it run until it was hot before walking back over to the brunette and standing in front of her, hands on her hips.

"What…what was that?" Rachel muttered.

Quinn shrugged her shoulders. "I, um, I," Quinn struggled to find the words to explain everything. She sighed big before starting over. "Let's just say yesterday I had some sort of epiphany about the way I treat you, and finally realized I was wrong. I was just self-conscious about being popular and I thought the only way people would like me was if I was a bitch, but I realized no one really likes me, they just pretend to. Which means I tortured you everyday for no reason. And I feel really, really bad about it, and I know no matter what I say it will never make up for what I did to you and how bad you felt because no one ever deserves to feel that badly about themselves. And I just want you to know I will never throw another slushie into your face or call you another horribly rude name again." Quinn noticed the whole time she said this she was staring at the white linoleum floor, scared to look into Rachel eyes, but she forced herself to look up.

Rachel's chocolate brown eyes were brimming with tears. "Th…thank you Quinn," Rachel stammered.

"You know, I tried to tell myself I did this to you because you tried to steal Finn from me, but I honestly never loved Finn. I did this, I think, because I had always been jealous of your confidence in yourself. You've always known who you truly are and you've known what you wanted and you've never let anyone, including myself, get in the way of that. I've always struggled with knowing my true self because I've always been trying to please other people, and never myself. I know that's no excuse to treat you the way I did, but I thought you deserved to know." Tears were now filling Quinn's eyes as well.

"I forgive you," Rachel whispered.

"You do?" Quinn asked, surprised.

Rachel nodded. "I've never really hated you, Quinn. If anything, I've kind of felt sorry for you. Because I've always known even though you were constantly surrounded by people you were just as lonely as I was. And I know how bad it feels to be that lonely."

"I'm going to make sure you're never that lonely again," Quinn said.

Rachel smiled at her and it was then that Quinn noticed there was still red slimy corn syrup running down Rachel's face. "Why don't I start by helping you clean all this up?"

Rachel nodded. "Okay." Quinn walked back over to the sink where the water was still running, Rachel at her heels. Rachel reached into her purse before pulling out a towel and sticking it under the water.

"You keep a towel in your purse?" Quinn questioned.

"Well, when you have to do this everyday you learn the best ways to get it off," Rachel answered.

"Oh," Quinn said, eyes diverted to the floor once more.

"Maybe you can go get my extra clothes out of my locker while I clean it off?" Rachel suggested.

Quinn nodded as she walked towards and out the door. The first bell had rang and everyone was in class now, so the hallway was empty as she walked to Rachel's locker. She then remembered she hadn't asked for Rachel's locker combination. She sighed and decided to try the combination in her fantasy the day before, and was very surprised when it worked. It made her wonder how real the fantasy had been. She shook the thoughts out of her mind as she reached in and grabbed a bag of clothes.

When she opened the door to the bathroom she saw Rachel using the rag to wipe the last of the slushie out of her hair.

Rachel turned around a bit alarmed to hear the door opening but relaxed when she saw it was Quinn. "How'd you get that? I didn't notice until after you left I forgot to tell you my combination."

Quinn didn't know how she would explain this one. She sighed knowing it would just be better to tell her the truth. "Okay, well, you know how yesterday I fell in the pyramid and hit my head?"

Rachel nodded.

"Well when I was unconscious I had this very vivid dream or fantasy or whatever it was where I woke up and I was you."

Rachel raised her eyebrows. "You mean like Freaky Friday?"

"Kind of." Quinn then proceeded to tell Rachel exactly what had happened starting from when she found out she was Rachel to when she fainted in the choir room, waking her up.

"That has an extensive amount of detail about my life for it to be just a dream," Rachel said. "How could you possibly know that my dad says that to me every morning?"

Quinn shook her head. "I'm just as confused about all of this as you are. If I believed in fate or whatever I would say its that."

"I believe in fate," Rachel said. "You know, Quinn, you and I aren't so different. We both have some sort of pathological need to be popular, and we both have hurt others doing it. I'm not perfect, Quinn, I've hurt people, too. Granted it wasn't for as long or as mean as you, but I've also done things I'm not proud of."

"Lets make a deal then," Quinn suggested. "We will both look out for each other and if we see that happening we have to tell the other person, no matter what."

"Deal," Rachel smiled a she stuck out her pinky.

"Pinky promise? Really?"

Rachel nodded. "It's the only way to make it legit."

Quinn playfully rolled her eyes as she stuck out her pinky and interlocked it with Rachel's. The brunette shook their pinkies once before they let go.

"Well I guess I should go change so we can get to class," Rachel said. "We've probably already missed half of it."

"Oh, yea, we should probably do that," Quinn said. "Well, um, I'm glad we could finally talk about everything, and I just wanted to apologize again."

"Thanks, Quinn. I'll see you in Glee." Quinn nodded and waved before heading out into the hall and to AP World History class. She felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off her chest. Rachel had forgiven her, and even though Quinn still didn't understand why, she was glad she had. She even got the impression that it was possible the two might actually become friends, which for some off reason she couldn't explain, made her kind of excited.

X-X-X-X-X

The next thing Quinn knew she had to do was talk to Puck. She had ignored him for almost eight months and it was finally time to swallow her pride and knock down the wall she had been building between the two of them.

She knew Puck well enough to know that during his study hall period he always went outside to chew some dip instead of actually doing his homework. His study was the same period she had Pre-Calculus so halfway through class she excused herself to go to the bathroom, but instead of turning left towards the bathroom she turned right to go down the hall that led to the back exit by the dumpsters.

She opened the door and looked left behind the dumpsters to see Puck sitting on the ground against the wall.

"Hey," she said as she walked over to him.

He turned to see her and his face filled with surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"I just, um, I thought we should talk."

"Since when do you want to talk to me?"

Quinn nodded. "I deserved that. I deserve every mean thing you decide you want to call me because I know I've been horrible to you since Beth was born. But I was scared, Puck, so scared of how I felt about you. I tried to tell myself I didn't love you because it would have been easier and I wouldn't have to deal with getting hurt again. And I know I was being selfish when I did that, and I know I don't deserve your forgiveness. But I love you, Puck. I have ever since the day Beth was born, maybe even before."

"What about blondie?" Puck asked.

"You and I both know I never felt that way about Sam," she answered. "I was just using him to better my reputation, which means he's just one more person I hurt."

"You know it took you longer to realize all this than I thought," Puck smirked. "You're stubborn, you know?"

Quinn blushed a bit. "I've been told."

"So what does all this mean exactly?" Puck asked as he stood up and faced Quinn. She looked deep into his brown eyes and for the first time in months there was not pain in his eyes but hope. She knew he would rather die than tell her how much she had hurt him all those months because he was always trying to act tough. But the thing about them was that Puck never had to tell her. All Quinn had to do was look him in the eyes and she knew.

"It means whatever you want it to mean," she answered.

"You know I'm not good with commitment."

She looked down, a bit disappointed. "Oh, yea, sure, that's fine."

"But I think I can try," he said.

"Like I said, Puck, I don't want to get hurt again. I can't risk falling head over heels in love with you only to have you cheat and rip it all away. And I'm not ready to have sex again, and I probably won't be for a long time. I know that's a problem for you. So maybe we should just remain good friends."

"You're not even going to give me a chance?" There was that pain again, back inside his eyes.

"I want to give you a chance, Puck, but you didn't seem that convinced that it could work."

"I can make it work," he pleaded. He had already lost her once, and he wasn't sure he could do it again. Last time he had gotten so out of control he ended up in juvie, and there was no way he was going back.

"I'll make you a deal," Quinn started. "You don't sleep with or even kiss another girl for a week, and I'll see what I can do."

Quinn watched as he scrunched his forehead thinking about it. A week was going to be hard for him, but he was willing to do it if it meant getting her back. "Same goes for you. You've got to break up with Sam."

"Deal."

"Deal."

"Now we should pinky promise," she smiled as she stuck out her pinky.

"Really? This sounds like something Rachel would do." Quinn just giggled as she interlocked pinkies with someone for the second time that day.

"Now I better get back to class. They probably think I fell in the toilet or something," she laughed.

He laughed with her and it reminded her how much she loved to see his smile, and how she missed seeing it everyday. She hoped with all her heart that she could keep making him smile.

X-X-X-X-X

The next thing on Quinn's agenda was to quit Cheerios. As she walked into Coach Sylvester's office during lunch period to tell her the news she thought she would feel nervous or a bit regretful, but really all she felt was relief. She finally realized she had been lying to herself all these years when she said she liked cheerleading. The truth was she hated it. She hated wearing the uniform everyday. She hated wearing her hair in a ponytail. She hated all the practicing. And she hated all the people. She was glad, too, because it made this a whole lot easier.

She saw Sue was writing in her journal so she knocked on the doorframe and entered only when the eldest blonde looked up and motioned for her to come inside. Quinn took a deep, calming breath as she sat down in front of Sue's desk.

"What can I do for you, Q?" Sue asked, shutting her journal and focusing on the teen.

"I quit," Quinn blurted out loudly. She wanted to say it fast before she had the chance to chicken out.

Coach Sylvester lifted her eyebrows. "You what?"

"I quit," Quinn said, her voice a bit more smooth and confident now. That was, until she saw Coach Sylvester's face fall.

"No one quits the Cheerios unless they die or I kick them off," she said angrily.

"I just don't think it's what's best for me right now," Quinn said quietly.

"You're my best stunter. What am I supposed to do without you?"

"You figured it out last year; you'll figure it out this year," Quinn answered.

Sue sighed as the anger left her face. She had known since the first day Quinn re-joined the team that she didn't want to be there, and Sue hated doing things she didn't like. And as much as people thought her evil and heartless, she really did care about the kids' happiness, and she didn't want Quinn as miserable as she had been the year before. "You know Juno, I always knew this day would come. You haven't seemed as invested in the Cheerios as you used to be. And I don't want anyone on my squad who's not giving 150% anyway."

Quinn stared at her coach in disbelief. She half expected the woman to take a flame thrower to this place when she told her. She was, after all, abandoning the team for the second time. It took her a few seconds to realize she had actually agreed with her.

"You…you're not mad?"

Sue sighed. "I can't say the team isn't going to miss your talent, but we won nationals last year without you and we can do it again."

Quinn stood up. "Well, thank you for understanding."

"No problem." Quinn started walking towards the door but before she made it out she heard Coach yell, "And Q, I want that uniform back here by the end of lunch block. You don't get to wear it longer than you deserve."

This comment was nothing Quinn hadn't anticipated, which was why she had brought an extra outfit with her to school that morning. She walked to her locker and got her baby doll dress she packed and went to the bathroom to change.

When she walked back out into the hall with no Cheerios uniform on she felt oddly free. She felt like there was nothing more holding her back from being the person she was meant to be. She went back to Coach Sylvester's office to give her the uniform then scarfed down a yogurt before the bell rang for next block.

As she walked down the hall to her next class she could see people were giving her weird looks, wondering why on earth she wasn't in her Cheerios uniform. Finally someone worked up the guts to ask, and she answered honestly telling them she had quit. And by the end of that block it seemed as if the whole school knew.

She was at her locker getting her books for Spanish when Sam walked up to her. "So I guess it's true you quit the Cheerios?" he asked.

She sighed as she closed her locker door. "It's true."

"Well, why didn't you talk to me about it before you decided?"

"I didn't feel like that was necessary."

"But I'm your boyfriend."

"I need to talk to you about that, Sam," she said.

"Oh, this doesn't sound good."

"Can we go to the auditorium and talk about this?" she wondered. "No one is in there this period." Sam nodded nervously as he followed her to the auditorium.

She entered and chose a seat in the back row; he sat down next to her. "Sam, you know I think you're a great guy, and you've been so kind to me, but we've been pretending these last couple months and we both know it. We don't really like each other; we're using each other for popularity, which I might have been fine with then, but I've had a bit of a change of heart and I don't wanna do it anymore."

Sam sighed. "I've been thinking about the same thing."

"So, you're okay with this?"

"Can we still be friends?" he asked.

She nodded and smiled. "I think that's best."

"Then I'm okay with it."

"Thank God," she said, letting out a sigh of relief. "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings in any way. I know it was wrong to use you."

"It's not like I wasn't doing the same thing," he countered.

She nodded. "I guess you're right. But if it helps, Santana's been talking about you an awful lot."

He raised his eyebrow and smirked. "Really?"

Quinn nodded.

"Hmm, I'll have to talk to her about that then."

Quinn giggled. "I think she'd like that."

Just then the sound of the warning bell rang. Quinn picked her books up then stood and Sam did the same. "Thanks again for understanding."

"Anytime."

Quinn decided just to go for it and lean in for a hug, which she was happy to find wasn't awkward, but the same as always. This proved that the two were just meant to be friends.

They let go and walked out of the auditorium together before parting ways in the hall. Quinn smiled at him as they parted and turned to go to Spanish.

Word really does travel fast at McKinley because by the end of Spanish class everyone knew about quitting the Cheerios as well as her break-up. But none of this mattered to Quinn because she had Glee next. It used to be the only place where she could be herself, but now, thanks to whatever that dream was, she could be herself all the time.

Quinn was smiling as she turned the corner, almost to the choir room. She could hear the sounds of Rachel practicing her scales from all the way down the hall. Normally she would scoff when hearing this, but now it only made her smile. She was almost at the room when suddenly Karaofsky and Azimio were standing in front of her, slushies in hand. Quinn stood in front of them with her hands on her hips.

"Well, Q, we hear you quit the Cheerios for your precious Glee club," Karaofsky said. "I guess that makes you a loser now."

Quinn shrugged. "And so what if it does? Maybe I like being a loser."

"No one likes being a loser."

"You don't know me," she answered. "And you can slushie me all you want, but its not going to change who I am."

The two boys looked at each other and laughed. "Don't mind if we do." Quinn honestly didn't think the two boys were going to slushie her, and when she saw the cups moving towards her face she squinted her eyes shut.

"Hey!" she heard Puck's voice yell down the hallway, but it was too late, the slushie hit her square in the face and the excruciating cold burned her skin. There was so much corn syrup in her eyes she couldn't open them, but she heard the sound of a body slamming into a locker.

"What the hell was that?" she heard Puck scream. "You don't mess with my woman."

She was finally able to open her eyes and when she did she saw Puck with Karaofsky pinned against the locker, and Azimio trying to push him away. Before anything else could happen, Mr. Schuster came out of the choir room and ran to the boys (just in time, too, because it seemed Azimio was very close to punching Puck).

"Puck, what are you doing?" Mr. Schuster yelled as he pushed the boys apart.

"They threw slushies on Quinn," he answered. "I had to do something."

Mr. Schuster looked over to see Quinn, drenched in red slushie, and sighed. "Azimio, Karaofsky, I'm sorry but I'm going to have to take you to the principal's office." He then turned to the big group of people who had gathered to watch. "And you all get to class."

At the sound of that everyone began to scramble to their next class. Rachel came out of the choir room and gasped when she saw what had gone down.

She walked over to Quinn and grabbed her hand before turning to Puck. "Don't worry, I'll take her to get cleaned off. I owe her anyway."

He nodded and Quinn gave him a small 'thanks' before she was

being pulled to the bathroom by Rachel.

She thought about how weird it was to be rescued by Rachel, when usually it was her doing something awful to Rachel. But when the slushie hit Quinn, and she stood there, covered in it in front of everyone, she, for the first time, didn't feel humiliation. For some reason it seemed to feel almost right, like this is where she belonged. High school is all about finding yourself, and even though it took her a few years, Quinn finally found where she fit in best. And she didn't care if her parents approved or if she was on the bottom of the social latter because she was happy, and she realized happiness was a better feeling than being popular. Happiness was contagious and she wanted to give it to anyone she came into contact with. She is a better person, now, and there's no way she's ever going back.


End file.
